


the light inside the broken

by morgvn



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Couple, F/F, Grief, Therapy, Trauma, Unconditional Love, choni
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-11
Updated: 2019-12-11
Packaged: 2021-02-27 02:14:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21759859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/morgvn/pseuds/morgvn
Summary: cheryl sees riverdale high’s guidance counselor miss burble. she talks about her feelings and also about toni, the love of her life.
Relationships: Cheryl Blossom/Toni Topaz
Kudos: 60





	the light inside the broken

**Author's Note:**

  * For [You](https://archiveofourown.org/users/You/gifts).



> this is kind of a rewritten version of 4x08’s therapy session. i hope you enjoy this one-shot. x

"babe, i can come with you, if you like."

"it’s fine, tee-tee. i guess i must handle this on my own."

toni grabs cheryl’s hand and rubs it softly. she looks at her. cheryl’s eyes begin to fill with tears.

"you got this. babe? listen to me. you. got. this."

cheryl nods. "you’re right."

cheryl takes a step closer to the door. she exhales. her cold hand touches toni’s for the last time before entering the room. cheryl takes a look back, stares at toni for a few seconds and puts her fingers on the doorknob.

——

"cheryl blossom, nice to meet you! i’m miss burble, riverdale high’s guidance counselor."

cheryl nods and puts a smile on her face even though she’s afraid of talking. she knows what will happen next. miss burble will ask her about her past, about everything that happened, about all those tragedies. she’s not prepared to talk to her, she’s certainly not prepared to talk about everything to anyone. suddenly, her anxiety and her grief take over. she starts tearing up.

"what’s wrong, my dear? are you okay? take yourself some sweets", miss burble smiles and shoves the box of sweets forward. 

"i don’t want them, thank you."

"tell me. what’s going on inside your head?"

"why would i talk to someone i barely know?"

"i’m a guidance counselor. i’m here to talk about your problems. that’s my job. and i want you to leave this door with a better view of things. so tell me, cheryl. what is it?"

"it’s.. nothing. nothing important. honestly, i don’t know why i’m here. did mister honey tell you to ‘take care’ about me? because of the school dance? the vixens?"

"he did not. well, he didn’t mention ‘the vixens’ nor did he mention any school related topics. he wanted me to talk to you. about you and your mental health."

"i’m fine! don’t you see?"

cheryl looks down. she stares at the brown parquet floors. she sniffs. 

"acutally.. i’m not. i’m broken inside. don’t know what to do."

miss burble gives her a tissue. cheryl exhales. her eyes are red, they’re filled with tears. cheryl’s heart races. it beats. fast. and faster.

"i never talk about my feelings. i just.. after jason died, i felt something i never felt before. i was in pain. a pain no one else could imagine. it was a really, repeat, really weird feeling. it was like grieve, but way worse. jason was my twin, we had this bond. i don’t think anyone can imagine what i felt like."

"no, cheryl. i can’t imagine and i would never want to imagine how you’ve felt. but you’re strong. look at you. you’re a good student, you’re even student body president. you applied for highsmith college, you’re the leader of the cheerleading team, you have friends-"

"they’re not my friends. i.. i don’t have ‘real’ friends. i never had real friends. it may seem like i have friends but actually.. i know that no one likes me. before jason died i was different. i had a few friends. at least i had some. now i have no one. my mom? she disappeared. and honestly, i don’t even want her to come back. my dad? he committed suicide after murdering my dearest brother. my nana? she can barely hear me. the rest of my family? is either dead or hideous and terrifying. i have no one.."

a tear is rolling down miss burble’s cheek. 

"i am sorry, cheryl. i am truly sorry."

cheryl smiles. she tries to smile her pain away, as she always does.  
miss burble takes a look into her files. 

"antoinette topaz. student vice president, as i see. who is she? do you know her? i mean, do you know her well?"

cheryl rubs her eyes. she sniffs. she breathes heavily.

"i do. she’s my.. girlfriend"

"that sounds great, cheryl, doesn’t it?"

"i’m so glad to have her. she’s my light. she’s the one keeping me alive, for real. she’s truly the best person i know. the only person i still have."

cheryl sobs.

"she always has my back. and i know, i’m not easy. not at all. she totally accepts how i am. she is there for me. she always was."

"tell me more. how did you get so close?"

"it was that one night, i remember. i was near pop’s chocklit shoppe. the diner, you know?"

miss burble nods.

"it was movie night. at the cinema, next to pop’s. i was there because everyone was there. honesty, i didn’t even want to go there. everyone was in company. everyone was there with friends or their family. but me.. i was there alone. i was sad, really sad. but i tried to smile it away. as i always do.  
i ordered a cherry phosphate, my favorite drink. i wanted to grab it, i wanted to walk away, i wanted to go back to sleep and not wake up ever again. but then.. she came. toni. she was really cheeky, i assume. she was in quite a good mood. she looked gorgeous, by the way. she wore that blue jeans jacket, her wavy hair with those cute little pink highlights looked perfect."

miss burble smiles. "go on."

"i asked her why she was stalking me because honestly, it felt like she was following me the entire time. i was never used to that. no one was ever interested in things i did, if i didn’t force them to be interested. she said that she wasn’t stalking me. she was actually about to meet with a friend but they bailed on her.  
she saw that something was wrong with me. she saw my sadness. i don’t know how, she just did.  
in conclusion - we watched the movie together, we took milkshakes at pop’s and talked. we talked about my past. about my hideous mother. we talked about topics, which i would never talk about. especially not to a girl who i barely knew. but i opened up. she grabbed my hand. she told me i was sensational. it was the most.. most beautiful thing i’ve ever heard someone saying about me. it brightened my day."

"that’s really sweet. and indeed, i can truly believe that you’re sensational"

"thank you, miss burble. she’s the sweetest. as i said, she’s the best person ever. i mean it."

"i can believe that. look cheryl, as i hear, she really cares about you and your feelings. maybe.. you should talk to her more often. talk about your feelings, open up about them. i know you can."

"i try to. it’s not easy."

"of course it’s not.."

"yeah. also because of everything which has been going on lately in school and in ‘thistle house’."

"do you.. want to talk about it?"

"yes. but i... there’s something more important."

cheryl put the tissues on the table. she grabs her cherry-red bag and her phone and leaves the room. she is about to text toni but then she sees toni sitting on one of those wooden chairs in front of the room.

"tee-tee...", cheryl says in a quiet and calming voice.

cheryl sighs. she hugs her. she hugs the love of her life. she hugs the most important person in her life.

"i love you. so much", cheryl whispers. she’s crying onto toni’s shoulder and she does not let go of her. 

"i don’t know what was happening inside that room, or what you’ve been talking about with this guidance counselor but i love you, too. i love you more than you could imagine.

cheryl holds on to her tight.

miss burble opens the door and walks past the two of them. she smiles. "you two are sensational." she winks.

both cheryl and toni take a surprising look at miss burble. they smile. those smiles. the ones filled with pure adoration.

toni grabs cheryl’s face and kisses her.

"you’re sensational, cheryl."


End file.
